Welcome to another week of The Bachelor Australia and there aren't many girls left! FINALLY right?! Cause this show seems to never, ever, ever, end. And we're so ready to see Sophie Monk already as The Bachelorette so off we go!
We begin the episode with a group date. And low and BEHOLD it's another school exercise where Matty is going to ask them questions and they need to do the right thing otherwise he'll evict them.
There are 6 boxes and the girls need to arrange themselves on said boxes from least to most of whatever Matty asks them.
So the first topic is WHO IS THE FUNNIEST. Tara is hands down the funniest, but Elora is like NAH GUYS I'M FUNNY.
The next question is who is the most down to earth and Elora runs for the top box AGAIN.
The questions went on and on and on and Elora just wanted to be on that top box.
Another question: Who is the most considerate? Tara's like GUYS I FOLDED YOUR TOWELS AT 5AM I'M CONSIDERATE. I totally agree. That is incredibly considerate. Like how good is waking up and there's a lovely folded towel waiting for you. All about it. Tara for the win.
The next game was super irrelevant, rating deal breakers etc. And surprise, surprise, Matty's number one deal breaker was someone who didn't want to have kids. Mate, calm your farm. Are you saying that CHEATING isn't your #1 deal breaker? Righto.
OMG AND BREAKING NEWS BUT THERE'S THE MOST OBVIOUS PRODUCT PLACEMENT during all of this. Elise is writing fake vows for Matty after she progresses to the next round and she pulls out her EXTRA CHEWING GUM.
At least go with spearmint, am I right guys?
Anyway, Elise and Elora had to write vows for Matty and read them out to him. Elise was realistic and sweet. Elora kept mentioning fire. We get it Moana. She talked about running wild and free and blah blah and Mi Scusi Pocahontas, but calm.your.farm. Matty doesn't want to run wild and free. He wants to SETTLE and have LITTLE BABIES. CUTE CHUBBY BABIES with dimples. Elora, gurl, you gonna go home. Baiiiiiiii
At this point, also, we're in the commercial and an ad comes on about a Dirty Dancing special next. I'm excited.
We come back to The Bachelor and there's a shot of Matty skimming rocks over the water and in his voice over he says "I've only just skimmed the surface with many of the girls". I don't have time Matty. I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THESE CORNY LINES. GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER, LIKE YESTERDAY.
He invites Cobie for a single date and surprises her with a pink helmet, cause they're going to go and climb obstacles. I have a bad feeling about this. Cobie gurl, I think you're gonna go home. Matty is calling her 'Cobes' for starters. I think she's been friend-zoned. AND OMG NEK MINUTE, in Matty's piece to camera, he's like "We're like really good friends". Then when she completes her part of the course, they HUG. Then he's like "I want to explore a more romantic relationship" but meanwhile he's making her wear a pink helmet. Like make up your mind Matty.
OH HONEY. You gonna go home gurl. It's been fun gurl. RIP.
Later that evening they spend more time together at the obstacles course, decorated with candles, cause Channel 10 budget cuts. They drink beers. Oh honey. You're going home.
Matty then awkwardly breaks up with her. He's like you're so sweet, and caring, and beautiful. But you're not good enough, you're like a child, and it's not gonna work out. Ok so he doesn't say ALL of that but he's basically like there's no fire. There's no spark. "For me it hasn't happened. The spark isn't there". Watching him break her heart is pretty brutal to be honest. She's like a bunny rabbit. You just want to protect her. She's not as fluffy.
He keeps telling her she's amazing, like JUST STOP MATE. STOP.
Cobie is genuinely devastated. She thought they had a wonderful date. She was falling in love. She'd already called some reception places and organised some save the dates. But sadly, it just wasn't meant to be. Bye Cobie. Go live your life.
Later that evening, Osher rocks up to the cocktail party to break the news to the girls, who are pretty devo. Flo and Tara are genuinely devastated.
Meanwhile Elora pretending to be concerned:
He then tells them they're going straight to a rose ceremony, so no one will have time to chat to Matty before it. Elora is then seriously concerned cause she knows she's going home. She knows that we know she's going home. Matty knows that she knows she's going home.
And surprise surprise, Elora is sent home. Look girl, you need to go and find John Smith and dance with the colours of the wind.
She's genuinely gutted. Like fair enough. She thought he was the one.
Home town visits tomorrow guys. Until then!