When your friend gets a new job - it’s great. “You go Glenn Coco”.
When your friend gets a new job… that requires you to have a party at your house - it’s the actual worst. “F*** no, Glen Coco”.
You know exactly what I’m talking about. One of those jobs that requires you to have a party at your house so they can sell their stuff. It could be anything from lip-glosses or lingerie to machines that cook, chop and heal the sick.
It’s tough, because you want to support your friend and help them out, but you are also poor and don’t want to buy anything you don’t need. Because you keep doing that and that’s why you are 32 and still renting but have 54 pairs of shoes you don’t wear.
The worst thing is, you get it. Because a lot of these jobs enable a lot of people to work the hours they want and a lot of parents love these gigs. Life is a hustle so you get it!
But, it’s gotta be one of the worst double-edged sword situations/friendship dilemmas ever.
Because you sincerely do want to support them - but their new job requires a lot from you. Also, you’ve already hosted so many of these parties in the past. You just can’t do it again. You can’t put your family and friends through it again. It’s an awkward blend of “Yay Cheezels and Jatz are here” but also “Oh god I feel so much pressure to buy something” (even though there is no pressure to buy, there is pressure to buy).
I know this because I own so much guilt Tupperware and knife sets it’s not funny.
Here is a re-enactment of what happened the other day… as you can see it’s a confused mix of support and poverty.
Friend: So…Guess what!? I have a new job… I started at ******…. I’m a consultant!
Me: Oh my God! That’s the best! You can make your own hours and I hear they are great!
Friend: Can I put you down to do a party? I have to get 5 parties on the books so I can get my free thing and start earning.
Me: I mean I can ask…? Mum just hosted a ***** and ***** party so she may not be down.
Friend: It’s just if I sell 3 in the first week I get $2500 and a water bottle…
Me: I know but I mean…
Friend: Come on!!!… I could get a free water bottle…
So, what’s the solution you ask to this?
I have two – number one, don’t have friends.
Or, more realistically two, put off the party - knowing they will give up that job. Honestly have you ever known someone to do this kinda work for more than 12 months? Seriously.
I also have so much Amway if anyone wants some!
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