Does anyone else think that this season of The Bachelorette has gone really quick? How are we seriously at the FINALE already?!
Anyway, here we are, the final stretch where Sophie must choose between the magnificent Apollo, loving Jarrod or Stu, the silver fox.
Now, earlier today we noticed that Stu posted a photo of himself standing with his final two rivals and realised that it COULD mean that he wins the show.
So, let's see if he makes it through this episode, shall we?!
Jarrod is first up and he's reminiscing about his time with Soph and how much he loves her.
Soph rocks up in a Ferrari because, of course she does, and she tells Jarrod that they're going go karting!
Go karting is super fun, in case you didn't know!
To make things interesting, a wager is made.
If Jarrod wins, Sophie has to be his butler for the rest of the day, but if Sophie wins... Jarrod's dancing in his underwear!
I really want Jarrod to dance in his undies... just for the gif.
Buuuuuuut, Sophie took pity on Jarrod and told him that they can switch bets and he can just be her servant.
Dammit Sophie, why do you have to be so damn nice?!
So, then things get serious.
Sophie's like, "he's got everything I want in a man," and jarrod's all like, "do you love me?"
Yeah, you heard me.
He asked Sophie if she's in love with him and you know, that's going to end well...
So, he asked the question and what did Sophie do?
The poor girl teared up and got real deep and I started crying too and OH MY GOD I can't handle this!
Now that we've wiped away our tears, (just me?), we see Stu!
Stu is hanging out underneath the Sydney Harbour Bridge and Soph pulls up in a MASSIVE stretch limo for some ungodly reason.
They drive around in the limo, drinking champers and just chatting away and OMG if Stu doesn't win, then we're going to have a riot on our hands!
These guys are just too adorable and silly!
Soph and Stu end up at the aquarium and yes, this has happened before and no, THIS WILL NOT MEAN HE'S GOING HOME DAMMIT!
They get the chance to play with a dugong which then makes me think of school because I went to school in Queensland and we had HEAPS of dugongs in our town...
Now, we have another serious chat to get through.
Stu says he's extremely happy being with Sophie but he's worried about his children and their feelings about the whole situation.
He says he's concerned about letting them down and I just want to reach into the TV and cuddle him!
They talk about his divorce, marriage and how much they trust each other.
And what did we find out? Yes T-Swift, Stu is 'Ready For It'!
But then, he talks about friendship and how in a relationship, you need to be best friends.
Hasn't Sophie been saying that the ENTIRE series?!
So, of course, they seal their convo with a kiss.
Then Apollo arrives in a f$%^&ing HORSE DRAWN CARRIAGE!
Ladies and gentlemen, I think this may be the beginning of a new Aussie royal family!
They chat, they bond and then they go to the opera!
How freakin' fancy is that?!
Then we see the amphitheatre, which is up on the cliff in the middle of the Blue Mountains!
Okay, the guy is singing... I'm melting... this opera singer has melted my cold heart...
Then, the emotional conversation starts.
Sophie isn't sure he's emotionally ready to settle down and Apollo, well, Apollo is just having a great time.
She tells him that the other guys seem to be more into her than he does and he was just like, "you haven't seen that part of me yet."
DUDE, HURRY UP AND SHOW IT TO HER!
Apparently, soon Apollo is planning on doing this epic trick involving a straight jacket in the air and like, woah, dude!
Nail in the coffin though, he said he's not willing to get married for another 4 to 6 years.
HE'S SINGING! HE'S DO-DO-DODO-ING!
Why Apollo, whhhyyyyy!
Me too, babe.
Apollo has a single coming out btw:
Ready for it?!
Okay, okay... back to the show.
Rose ceremony time and look, we all know Apollo blew it.
He knew it too.
The breadstick just wasn't enough.
We'll always remember you, Apollo!