Last weekend, after Robert Pattinson revealed to us all that he actually deeply loves Twilight, I decided to settle the whole Team Edward or Team Jacob debate, once and for all.
How? By using the power of Facebook Polls to give the nation the opportunity to have their say.
It’s been almost ten years since the debut of the first Twilight film and the franchise has only gained more fans since, spreading across many generations of men and women.
Being a reader of the books first and then a lover of the films, no matter how cringe-y they could be, (Twilight was to me what Bieber was to many), I thought the final decision was clearer than the light of day.
Oh how wrong I was… and oh how unhappy I am.
Looking back at the results from the vast national audience I have access to, I found there was one alarming trend across each state.
Edward. was. not. the. winner.
My mind is reeling. My heart is breaking. My soul does not understand.
Here are the results from across the nation:
National Scoopla Audience
New South Wales
Obviously, our Scoopla fans have the most dedication to all things pop-culture and still have a soft spot for Twilight.
Still, I do not understand your votes…
I get it - Edward seems a little old-fashioned, overly broody, stuck in his ways, a hopeless and sometimes foolish romantic, kinda twisted, a little creepy (creeping into Bella’s bedroom while she slept), and way too stubborn at times.
And also a bit of a d**k for leaving Bella all alone in New Moon, only for her to get lost in the woods and curl up into a ball of tears.
Okay, so Jacob DID sweep in as the best friend and was a total cutie with his crush, who then got really territorial over Bella when Edward came back… only to then transform into a totally ripped teen who also happened to be a werewolf, who had to get his anger issues under control… only to later imprint on Bella’s newborn, Renesmee.
They’ve both got their downfalls, right?
I was obsessed with the Edward of the books and their true love kind of romance…
Hell, I’m a sucker for Romeo and Juliet, so maybe my vote on all of this is a little unhealthy - just like Bella’s.
But with Edward’s chivalry, his undying efforts to keep Bella safe, the connection they have with one another, the fact Bella is the only one whose mind he cannot read and that she CHOSE EDWARD - they’re obviously meant for one another.
Unconditionally and irrevocably meant for each other.
So WHY DID YOU ALL VOTE TEAM JACOB?!
Do you not like the book Edward? Do you not like Robert Pattinson as Edward?
Was it the whole Edward 'sparkles' thing you didn't like? (I'd understand on that one - vampires sparkling? Dafuq?!)
Or are you all biased and blinded by your obsession with Taylor Lautner's rippling muscles and six-pack abs, and relate to being eternally stuck in the friend zone?
Someone PLEASE help me out here…
Tell me why you’ve voted the way you have in the Facebook comments!